Overheard,Observed and Generally Awesome

Three:  Can I have some chocolate milk?

Me:  Sure, after you eat your dinner.

Three:  Oh, dammit.

************

Three: You have peach skin, I have brown skin.

Me:  Yes.  I think it's beautiful.

Three:  I want to have peach skin.  Peach is my favorite color.

Me:  Isn't orange your favorite color?

Three:  Nope, peach.

Me:  Really?  You know, some of my favorite people are brown.  Auntie R, Grandma S, .....

Three: I LIKE Peach!

Me:  Ok.  We're different, but I think we are both beautiful.  What do you think?

Three:  I have boogers and sneezes and I NEED a Kleenex!!  Now!!

Me:  I'm glad we had this talk.

**********

Me, in the bathroom:  Three, you have to wipe front to back.  No, wait, you need to make sure to wipe your bottom.

Three: But I DID.

Me:  Your whole bottom!

Three:  I DID! I DID IT!

Me:  Not really.  Wipe the WHOLE bottom!

Three, shouting:  I.  Wiped.  MY.  BUTT!

Me, exasperated:  I mean you have to actually wipe your whole butt, even in your butt crack.

Silence.

Three, in a tiny voice:  Butt crack?

Then hysterical laughter. She literally cried, she laughed so hard.  Then...

Three:  Butt crack, butt crack, butt crack...

Me:  You, know, that is a potty word and we can only say it when we are in the potty.

Three:  Ok.

A few hours later, I hear loud, hysterical laughter from the bathroom.  Sounds like there is a party in there. Giggling and snorting and guffaws and dancing.

Then I hear Dan's voice:  BUTT CRACK?  Hahahahhaha!! 
Three:  Yes, Mommy said BUTT CRACK!!

More laughing.

Me:  Grow up, all of you!

******
A story from Hoosier Girl:

So the girls were playing with their dolls and having them get married.  I asked who would be the preacher, and the girls told me I should be the preacher. I started the ceremony, but stopped to ask what the girl doll's name was, and it was Dell.  When I asked who the boy was, Moo replied, in an exasperated voice:  It's KEN.  It says so right there on his underwear!!

******

A sign on Moobear's door:

"Sleep over.  No boys allowed.  Except Daddy and Star Wars Boy*"

* Name has been changed to protect the name of Moobear's good friend.

*******

Family Movie Night, we're watching Rudy.

Moobear, "They keep talking about dressing for the football game, where are the dresses?!!  Who is going to wear the dresses?!"

Me:  If you're waiting for the dresses in this movie, you're going to wait a loooooong time.

Later, we're playing let's see if we can spot Daddy in the band in the movie.  I'm convinced I see Dan.

Me:  Look honey! It's you.! That is TOTALLY you.

Dan: That looks EXACTLY like me, except that he's playing trombone, and I played trumpet.

Me:  Whoops.  He's totally cute, though.

Dan:  Nice save.

Has it been three years?

We have some friends who are in China meeting their daughter for the first time.  Just about this same time of year three years ago, end of April/beginning of May, we were in Ethiopia.  Thus, we have been thinking about and remembering our adoption trip.  I just can't believe that three years ago about this time we were in Ethiopia and Three looked like this:

And now she looks like this:

Racisim and Stereotypes Alive and Well in America!

Shame on you, Disney, and shame on the makers of this candy.
 Here's a link to one of my must read blogs, Racialicious, if you want to join the conversation.  Photo credit:  Racialicious.

Priorities

After the Superbowl, on the way home from a party:

Moo:  I liked that car the player got.  The black one.

She's referring to the Corvette gifted to Eli Manning.

Doodle:  It was cool. 

Moo:  And he forgot to get the keys at first!

Doodle:  Can we get a car like that?

Dan:  Yes, but we will need to use your college fund to pay for it.  Should we do that?

Moo:  No!  College is more important than a car.

Doodle:  A car is a want, not a NEED.


My heart swells with pride.  Briefly.

Three:  I want a green one.  No, maybe an orange one.  The fast one car.  That one.  Yes.

An Admirer From Afar....

I got this email from the Mom of a boy in Moobear's class two days ago:

Hi there,

I am Mark's* mom and am writing to ask what Mark* can get for Moobear for Christmas?  It turns out he has a crush on her (I found out after the Halloween get-together) and wants to give her an anonymous gift.  I only have tonight and tomorrow night to get her something...any suggestions?

thanks!

 

My response:

How cute!  That is adorable.  I won't tell!

Moobear loves anything pink, mini erasers, Barb*e, plain notebooks or journals--especially ones with cats on them-- she is obsessed with cats right now, legos, stickers, stuffed animals, lip gloss.  She also loves to bake cupcakes and cookies.  Does that give you enough to go on?

 

Mark's* Mom:

Thanks!  I'll see what I can come up with.  Please don't say anything, Mark* is very shy about it.  I guess other boys like her too so he can't even tell his friends!  Have a great holiday.

 

My reaction, reading the last email was, oh that is so sweet, but wait a minute,  OTHER BOYS LIKE HER TOO?

 

It appears that the pretty pink princess Halloween costume was an amazing choice!

 

I've kept the secret, and I can't wait to hear about the present that is mysteriously going to appear in her locker today.   Every girl deserves to have a secret admirer in her life. 

 

In other news, Doodle tells me she can beat up boys.  Apparently there is a boy in her class that she pretend fights with all the time at recess.  Who knew the girls would be so different?

 

*Not his real name.  All names have been changed to protect the feelings, hopes and dreams of one very cute, very sweet little boy. 

Happy Holidays!

 

 

 

 

A Challenge for Santa

As of this morning, we had no idea what Santa was going to bring Three for Christmas.  Previous conversations went like this:

Me:  Three, what do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas?

Three:  A DS.  And a pen.

Me:  But you can't have a DS until you are 7.  Is there anything else you want Santa to bring you?

Three:  A DS and a pen.

Me:  Never mind.

This morning, we made some progress (sort-of).

Me:  Three, what should Santa bring you for Christmas?

Three:  A DS and a pen.

Me:  You can't have a DS until you are seven.  Is there anything else you want Santa to bring you?

Three:  A laser.  Lasers.

Me:  A laser???

Three:  Yes, lasers.

Me:  What, may I ask, are you going to do with a laser?

Three:  I'm going to shoot them.  Pew! Pew! (shooting noises).  And I'm going to kill her.

Me:  Three, it's not nice to kill people.  We don't shoot people with lasers.

Three:  It's pretend.  It's just lasers.

Me:  So the only thing you want from Santa is a laser?

Three (exasperated, speaking as if I am a complete idiot):  YES.  And a DS.

Awesome.  Those elves have their work cut out for them. 

Pictures of the "broken smile"

I'm ready to share pictures of my lopsided face-- it's still not 100% better, but it's getting there.  Frankly, I'm not sure why posting the photos was difficult--maybe because it made the thing all the more real? 

I had some awesome reactions, though.  A few people asked about dental work.  A very nice person at work asked if I needed help and basically asked if my husband had hit me (ummm, no!).  Since I needed to wear my eye patch occasionally at work, my coworkers joked about my "pirate hour" and offered to "bling up" the eye patch.  Lots of nice emails, and a family friend sent me a beautiful orchid. 

My face is at least symmetrical, but the paralysis is noticeable when I smile with my mouth open.  On the one hand, I'm grateful for the recovery I've had and that other than my appearance, my body is in working order.  On the other hand, my appearance does bother me from time to time--and I'm embarrassed to admit that I'm that vain.  I'm self-conscious now about my facial expressions and shy away from pictures.  Physically, the only remaining symptom, other than the smile, is an annoying watery eye. I'm constantly saying, "No, I'm not crying. Seriously, I'm fine. It's just my thing from the shingles." My left eye can still water for hours at a time-- which means I wear my glasses everyday.  Also, I lisp a tiny bit when I say "p" words in a row.  I sound like Elmer Fudd when the dog is in trouble,"  Pritizie, Prizie, PRITZIE!"

Now for the pictures.  At first glance, it looks like the right side of my face is wonky.  Then it is clear that the right side is turned up in a smile and the left is well, drooping.

Here it is the night it happened (July 30th):

Here I am a month later, on the first day of school for the girls (last week in August):

Another month later (October) at the Shedd Aquarium.   I must admit, a low cut shirt does help distract others from the face:

Slowly, the symmetry comes back a bit.  This photo is from November 11th:

Getting there.  I hope that by Easter my photos will be normal.  We'll have to see what the Christmas photos look like. 

If they aren't better by Christmas, I have now ruined the surprise of our holiday card.  Sorry.