The Adventure Begins!

Instead of getting ready for our big trip, I'm blogging. Probably to avoid the issue for a little while longer. I've been really weepy lately. Worried about the trip, worried about my girls without us, work stress. And now, it's here. Some of it is the normal before a baby stuff-- right before I gave birth to each of the girls, I had this "Oh shit" moment. Thinking that things as they were were pretty great and what in the heck was I thinking changing it all up. Now, there is a lot of worry intertwined with the thoughts of the new life. And this time, I know for sure life is going to change in a fundamental way. Ina way, it's not the change itself I worry about---it's the process. The growing pains of a new family where three of the members arrive jet lagged, and two of the members are coming off of a sugar high the likes of their bodies have ever seen. Not to mention the gifts and super attention of all of the relatives overcompensating for our absence.

And the newbie? Still feels like a theoretical possibility. After years of little disappointments, I've finally succeeded in distancing myself from the process a bit. I think it won't be truly real until they put her in my arms. For the record, I think this is only fair--with the c-sections, Dan got to hold the girls waaay before I did. This time it's my turn. Just my luck, she'll probably puke on me.

I do want to take a moment and thank all of the people who made this adoption possible. In particular, K, S, and T. They hosted a bon voyage party on Saturday for us that was great! It was a nice distraction and a moment to chill before the last minute craziness. They even spoiled my girls, who felt like important big sisters. I would post pictures, but in the madness (and the 5 kids) I totally forgot to take them. Also thanks to R, who accompanied me on my pedicure yesterday and helped talk me down after Dan spent the day at work (a patient died).

Well the first girl is awake this morning, so the race begins!